Me, Road Captain in Pride parade. That was my Harley on the left.

It’s June, “Pride Month”—for LGBTQ, but not for transsexuals if we don’t agree to hide our sexuality.

It’s a paradox. LGBTQ who rightly insist that society accept them with their difference are not extending that acceptance or even tolerance to transsexualism unless we say we’re transgender.

In the LGBTQ movement, the T only means “transgender,” not also “transsexual” which is included by implication with gender, not even “trans person.”

Prejudice usually, there, takes the form of dislike or disgust of “transsexual” for mentioning “sex,” for saying it’s a different thing from transgenderism. Hating or hiding trans sex issues is sex-negative, a form of transphobia. the way it works at Price events for me, any more, is if I say I’m transsexual. Then people turn their nose up at me, even claim I did something I didn’t do, want me out.

A common scenario: I’m friendly in general, glad to see people, hoping to make friends…then they realize I’m not June Cleaver and ask, “Are you transgender?” I smile and say, “No, I’m transsexual.” Suddenly their light of friendship fades. Defensive assumptions are made that I think I’m superior to others, that I don’t like them somehow, that I’m not compassionate for the plight of transgenders or that I’m hostile to them. They distance. I don’t get invited to events and things I then later say or do are mis-interpreted as not okay, sometimes I’m threatened—rather like some muggles have done to me just for being a trans person.

The anti-trans-physical-sex transgender paradigm is enforced in mis-guided compassion for transgenders’ request for privacy. I’m expected to hide my sexuality because others want to hide theirs, and if I don’t, I’m ousted. People don’t seem to mind that it slams me.

My husband, Joe, was a conservative Republican Christian Defense Dept. engineer; I was a liberal Democrat Jewish transsexual. Respect, liking, even loving someone with a different view is part of my nature.

I have to have their view or I’m disliked?

How is that respect with difference?

How is that any different from a straight person who dislikes a gay person?

How is that any different from someone of one religion or race who may not like another for such a difference?

This is bias, prejudice, and it’s as ugly for people to press on me as it is for other, more recognized minorities: liberal people who don’t like conservative people; white people who don’t like black people; religions who don’t like each other; transgenders who don’t like transsexuals unless we say we’re also transgender.

I am transsexual. I am okay as such. I need acceptance for my own salient issues.

I need to exist.

Posted by:Jenna Ware

Widow of Joseph F. Ware Jr., Dept. Mgr. Engineering Flight Test, Skunk Works, Lockheed (2 Air Force Ones, U-2, SR-71...); former NSA, NSOC, NSGA, Ft. Meade, MD; former forensic psychiatric social worker, MSW, LCSW; pilot, ATP/CFI; co-founder Ware Lab, Virginia Tech; asking for equality for all, including our sexuality; transsexual, 1981; author of "Shadow Life," sharing dangers of hiding trans person sexuality so others don't make the same mistakes I did.

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