False Umbrella for Trans People

T Phenomena on med blue field

WHY THE FIGHT OVER WHAT WE ARE
WE MUST BE OURSELVES
THE TRANSGENDER PARADIGM MUST EVOLVE

WHY THE FIGHT OVER WHAT WE ARE

The arguments between trans groups happen because the transgender phenomenon (the largest out group) popularly (1) hides opposing sexualities and (2) uses the same term for themselves and everyone else.

Look at the confusion that results:

  • Transgenders (B) use their term for everyone.
  • The transgender umbrella says transsexuals (A) are transgender (C) because of a similar gender shift in society.
  • Many of us transsexuals (A) say we’re not transgender (B), not part of a group that doesn’t want to change sex.
  • Many of us also invalidate transgender (C, the umbrella) because of misrepresentation—but in denying we’re transgender (B) we get misunderstood as only meaning transgender (C), so then we’re told we must be in denial that we did, in fact, change gender role.
  • Changing gender role is the focus of transgenders (B), a la Virginia Prince, Ph.D. Changing sex is the focus of transsexuals (A). Sex and gender are not the same thing. Why can’t we be known for what we’re about?
  • Transgenders (B) say both transsexuals and transgenders are supposed to play down genitalia, use euphemisms/evasions, “because it’s private” and also ignore sex identity and sexual response as male or female as if they don’t exist, speak only of gender identity, gender role—because they fear rejection if they own their own sexuality.
  • But many transsexuals (A) say those physical sex aspects—physical sex identity, genitalia, sexual response as female—are our salient issues, that we’d die without the change of anatomic sex, that playing down our sex issues erases our identity, says we don’t exist as ourselves, that we’re transgenders with an extra surgery (D) or, in most cases, even implies we may be transgenders (B) without SRS who pretend maybe we’re (A), which we’re not supposed to mention.
  • We transsexuals (A) can’t well include the focus of the sex we need to be or our opposite sexuality because transgenders outnumber us some 30:1 and shout us down if we try.

T political umbrella paradigmUsing the same name for people who don’t want to change sex (B) and for everyone (C) is social engineering to benefit transgenders (B). Playing down sex-related issues is obfuscation. Implying you’re not your real self but possibly another phenomenon is subterfuge. The purpose of the transgender umbrella (C) is to make the focus on the transgender-preferred (B) gender role, and the technique is to misrepresent (A) to look like (B) and (B) to look like (A). An example can be seen in Caitlyn Jenner’s book, The Secrets of My Life, and in this video clip with Diane Sawyer.

I urge reporters, media, people to ask questions about all this, not collude with or enable this dysfunction.

It’s hard enough for us transsexuals to be understood without the paradigm confusing things.

The transgender paradigm, grouping disparate phenomena under one moniker while hiding issues to fit, skews research, misleads the public, friends, family, legislators, doctors, etc. How can I say what I am and what I am not? How can I refer to transgenders (B) in any clear way without a term of reference that’s allowed? How can anyone? “One who is transgender” is good, which Virginia Prince, Ph.D. popularized as “transgenderist,”—kind, descriptive, not derogatory, popularized by a transgenderist leader—but transgenders (B) say that’s offensive because it points out the sexuality they want to hide. I’m expected to comply, yet I point out that “transgender” (C) used for me is offensive, and few care or recognize the problem. Our voice is small.

That’s the power of terminology and the weakness of a smaller minority.

So let me say clearly, because it’s not out there from current trans leaders: I am transsexual; I am not transgender—not transgender (B) and also not an advocate of the sociopolitical transgender umbrella (C).

WE MUST BE OURSELVES

From my training and work as an MSW, LCSW (psychotherapist), from living in this role 36 years and working with others, from being “stealth” for 31 of those years, I’ve detailed 7 examples of how hiding these significant gender and sexual issues can seriously harm a life, create stress, alienation, loneliness, depression and suicidality. People who are newer do not yet know these things, and people in denial don’t want to know.

Transgenders: What kind of person are you if you feel you must hide your cisnatal sexuality for acceptance? If you can’t admit you don’t want to change sex? People in society don’t want you to be a woman with a penis/male sexuality, so you agree to hide yourself to please prejudiced people? Even to marginalize other people to make it work?

Transsexuals: You strive to become yourself, but you sit back passively and downplay your own opposite sexuality by allowing a transgender grouping (C) so transgenders (B) or supporters won’t slam you? That’s giving in to oppression, agreeing to play yourself down because others want to use you or don’t want to deal with your real self.

THE TRANSGENDER PARADIGM MUST EVOLVE

I believe transgenderists (B) can use 21st century T progress in society as a springboard and begin to open up with the truth, as Virginia was doing. People know, anyway; not admitting it discredits both people and the movement and causes trouble for ourselves.

Without that truth, socially, for all Ts,

  • we marginalize ourselves, treating ourselves as if we’re something that shouldn’t be mentioned,
  • create their own unequal employment opportunities, can’t take anything with a locker room…
  • create gossip from x-lovers and people who guess, contention with people who argue the triuth, and
  • enable hate crimes because bullies pick on people who won’t defend. (See my life story.)

and more intrapsychically,

  • we can’t stand up for ourselves when trouble happens, may not even feel we can report prejudices or hate crimes,
  • we seem eccentric, trying to deal with it, anyway, handling things others don’t know about, and
  • we can’t unlearn we’re not okay. The message inside most of us get from childhood that we’re not okay isn’t going away long-term if we won’t let our subjects come up, if we won’t let people tell us to our face that we’re okay for this difference. The result can be later-life deleterious low self-esteem and suicidality.

That goes for me, for transsexuals in general, for transgenders/transgenderists too, for all of us.

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